Thursday, October 7, 2010

Day 6 twenty things that calm you

1. My husband. Sounds lame I know. But just his being in the same room brightens my day, calms me down and tames my grief a bit.
2. Music. I have totally changed my style of music since losing Leta. I like Indie music a lot. I listen all day and night. I have a night time play list called "in the wee small hours of the morning" that is so peaceful and soothing.
3. Photography. I'm no good, but I love doing it. I love editing pictures. I love lomography. The bright over saturated colors make my heart happy.
4. Thrift stores. I heart thrift stores. I dig anything vintage. I love cheap bargains!
5. I'm not gonna lie. Xanax. God bless Xanax.
6. Girls night out. I don't leave my house often (I'm a bit of an agoraphobe lately) but I try to go out with a few girlfriends once a month. The two in particular make me laugh, allow me to speak candidly without judgement, encourage me, and love me. I never imagined a year ago that I would have such amazing women in my life, but I do. They didn't know me "before" but I am so grateful for these two ladies!
7. Faces of loss website. Reading other peoples stories makes me feel so much less alone.
8. Notes from my children. They are charming and wonderful and I treasure them.
9. Anything Blue. Anything.
10. Reading. Reading anything. I devour books. I read sometimes two a day. I've been trying to read scriptures more as well.
11. Naps. I love naps. LOVE ell oh vee ee naps!
12. The way my children smell. Weird i know. But it's so intrinsically THEM.
13. My husbands neck. It smells incredible, always the same. I wish I could bottle that smell. I think I must be a freak.
14. Collage. Right after Leta died I made this HUGE collage that really expressed my feelings of grief. I think it's beautiful.
15. Creating anything! Drawing, painting, gluing, sewing. It stops my brain and slows me down a bit.
16. Writing.
17. The river. I am so drawn to the river and I can't quite explain it. I can sit there for hours and do nothing but absorb the sights and sounds. It's a 5 minute walk from my house and I go a few times a week.
18. My bed. The way my blankets feel. The softness of my sheets. My pillows (I'm a freak about my pillows) I feel safer there than anywhere else.
19. You wouldn't believe it, but laundry. The routine, the washing, drying and hanging up.
20. Lame I know, but seriously My husbands eyes. He has these amazing eyes. I can just look at him and know he loves me, doesn't judge me, and is willing to care for me in all my craziness and grief for as long as I need. I really don't think I realized how much I love him until Leta died. Sad I know. But he has been and is such an amazing human. I'm glad to know him.

1 comment:

  1. As far as number 19 you are so welcome to come and enjoy our laundry as much as you would like. :o) And I think we need to get out soon!